Prepare to laugh till your sides hurt! Our collection of the funniest trashy texts will have you saying “Ahh!” and “Waaoo!” in no time! These texts are pure gold, ranging from hilarious pickup lines to huge autocorrect mistakes. So grab some popcorn because you’re going to have a lot of LOLs and OMGs during this ride!
Laughing Through Hurricane Ida’s Aftermath
Everyone was relieved to be evacuated, but now look at you, without a home.
Ex-Wife’s Take on WW3
The statement “Ay, I hope my ex-husband gets deployed” implies that the speaker hopes their ex-husband will be sent on military service, either to build distance or to get rid of them. It suggests a wish to be taken out of their life or separated from it.
Chicken Woes, A Walmart Rant
Ling Ling’s ass with her Lemon Peppa Whing Swhimp is the reason I never get chicken when I go to Walmart. The head ass bought it all. The fried rice egg roll was ready in ten minutes.
The Girlfriend’s Deception
A friend has learned that the girlfriend of their mutual acquaintance is cheating on both the speaker and him. Given that both friends are impacted by the girlfriend’s adultery, it suggests that they feel betrayed and deceived.
Hope for Style Evolution
Their present fashion sense, which they characterize as akin to that of a “street walker” or someone who dresses provocatively, makes them feel uneasy or anxious. The speaker says they aim to change their manner eventually, but they hope it will happen organically as they become older rather than as a result of a terrible experience. In other words, people would rather grow out of their current fashion choices than having a bad experience force them to change.
Teacher Hiring Issue
The claim raises concerns about the justification for employing a teacher who does not speak English. Given that being able to speak English would normally be seen as a basic need for a teaching post, it suggests astonishment or incredulity that such a choice would be made. He seems perplexed or worried about this employment choice.
A Child’s Portrait on Skin
On his cheek, a man has a tattoo of a child’s face! Perhaps he simply wanted to add a bit more “kid” to his cheeky demeanor, but it looks like he’s really dedicated to babysitting. It’s undoubtedly a head-turner in any case.
Trashy stranger
Such words should not be taken seriously because they may encourage dangerous circumstances. They are probably meant to be humorous or brazen, maybe mocking the idea of showing off wealth or inciting problems.
Reevaluating Abortion Views
The experience of losing a pregnancy may cause the couple to reconsider their position on abortion, possibly considering it to be the taking of a life rather than just a medical treatment. It implies a belief that a developing fetus should be acknowledged as a human existence.
RN Skepticism on COVID Frontlines
Is it not unbelievable? We are currently battling COVID-19.This nurse believes it’s not a big problem that 19 people like superheroes! Really? To a chicken, it’s like attempting to convey complex concepts. People are saying things like, “Oh, it’s just like the flu, no biggie.” Yes, exactly! Comparing a kitten to a lion is analogous. They’re behaving like it’s easy, while I’m over here wearing a mask that feels like a facehugger from a science fiction film! I want to slam my head against the wall because of it, but then I realize that’s not socially distant. Living in a COVID comedy, huh?
Devotion and Prayer
Mom’s prayers are like having a secret weapon in your back pocket, no matter what is going on. She seems to have a direct line to the cosmos, and she doesn’t hesitate to use it! Mom might say, “No worries, I got this!” even if there is a mountain of laundry or a real mountain obstructing the driveway. It’s similar like having a superhero on speed dial, but she’s carrying a cup of tea while still in her jammies. When Mom is on the prayer hotline, you can’t help but think that everything will be fine. It’s similar to having an unlimited data plan with your very own personal guardian angel!
Weight Lose VS Heroine
Hold on, wait! Do you really think that a month of heroin use could aid in weight loss? It’s simply not the best idea to ask if leaping into a volcano will result in a tan. You may lose a few pounds, but at what price? Not only will you likely lose weight, but you’ll also likely lose your job, your teeth, and possibly even your freedom! Furthermore, would you really want to be remembered as the person who became addicted to heroin in order to lose weight? Believe me, there are much more effective ways to lose those excess pounds, such as going to the gym or eating more vegetables. Alright, let’s continue using the treadmill rather than the needle.
Happy mother’s Day
Okay, get ready for this one! Consider a sign that reads, “Moms get free cream pie.” At this point, you may say, “Hey, that’s cute! Moms are worthy of a treat. “Um, is this some kind of weird bakery special?” is another possible reaction. It’s similar to a guessing game when you’re not entirely certain if you’re discussing dessert or something else. Hopefully, the focus will be on pies rather than the other item. In any case, it’s a sentence that will undoubtedly make you stop and think!
Creative Interpretation
Now, here’s an example: picture someone claiming to be “making a flour line with a dollar note.” “Oh, they’re just getting ready to bake some cookies, right?” is one possible response. However, you might also think, “Wait a minute… are they trying to cook up something else?” Instead. It’s like attempting to guess whether a baking party or some other type of celebration is on the horizon! Hopefully, cookies will be the main focus and not the other things. Whatever the case, it’s a term that will leave you baffled!
Drunk Vs Ride
Let’s take a look at this: imagine someone who has had too many beers gets on their motorcycle and believes they are an expert rider. They feel like rock stars once they miraculously make it home safely. “Wait… how does this thing work again?” they ask themselves when they attempt to reheat some late-night nibbles in the microwave. It’s as if Easy Bake Oven replaced Easy Rider! How refreshing a reality check! The lesson here is that driving after drinking is not something to be taken lightly. When you’re not seeing double, it’s best to be safe and only cook.
Tattoo Trade Regret
Now imagine this amusing scenario: the guy says, “Hey, babe, wanna see my new tattoo?” “Cool, he must have gotten something meaningful or super artistic, right?” you ask yourself. However, when he lowers his sleeve, a large tattoo that reads “I Heart Cocaine” is seen! You ask yourself, “Um, what?!” As it happens, he exchanged that masterwork for his narcotics stockpile. The act of making snap decisions! He will always have that tattoo, which serves as a living reminder of his poor decisions. I suppose you could say that he is devoted to his… pastimes? At least it’s a conversation starter, even though it’s a comedy of errors!
Online Scam hurts feeling.
This scenario points to a string of regrettable incidents, such as a fictitious pregnancy crisis, falling victim to an internet fraud, and potentially having to sell possessions as a result. It emphasizes how crucial it is to exercise caution while using online resources and the possible repercussions of placing your trust in dubious sources.
Insane Love
The scenario depicts a scenario in which a person feels so overwhelmed or compelled to take drastic measures because they miss their partner so much. In this instance, they chopped off a portion of their girlfriend’s hair and kept it as a keepsake, indicating a wish to have a material recall of her even when she isn’t present.
You can’t be serious.
It conveys a wish to locate Italian eateries in Florence and Venice, Italy, that offer fare like to Olive Garden, a chain restaurant renowned for its informal Italian-American fare. The speaker expresses a particular desire for straightforward meals, such as spaghetti, devoid of excessively ornate or gourmet components.
Americans VS British’ Landmark
Now, prepare yourself for some amusing American-UK banter! Imagine, then, that a Brit and an American are debating the famous sites of their respective nations. “Hey, we’ve got the Statue of Liberty – a symbol of freedom and democracy!” The Americans say. “Yeah, but we’ve got the Eiffel Tower!” the British then say. Hold on a minute… the Eiffel Tower? Not in Britain, but in France! Talk about confusion! Let’s accept it, though. “What?” the Americans say. “The Eiffel Tower? Lady Liberty is nothing like that! She is fierce and amazing, much like Beyoncé of landmarks. “Well, at least our tower doesn’t turn green!” the British say. Burn, oh! People, it’s just friendly rivalry between nations, and it’s all in good fun!
